The Split Tailed Lion

The two hunters went to Antwerp and embarked on one of the large ships,

such as the crusaders made use of, to get to Jerusalem.

Reaching the mouth of the Nile, they tarried awhile in Cairo and in

Khartoum, and then pushed into the interior. They engaged a company of

native blacks, to carry their baggage, beat the bush, drive out the

lions, and carry the beast, when caught, in a cage; to the return

ships. The whole party, strung out in a line, marched into a famous

wide valley, where were also veldts, or open spaces. They camped to the

windward of a big water hole, to which the lions resorted, for drink

and their prey. There, they made a strong “hide-up,” or enclosure, of

tall reeds, bushes, and boughs of trees, all interlaced together. This

was for them to hide behind. Here they opened the lids of their

paintpots, and got ready their brushes to daub themselves all over,

with seventeen different tints and hues, in streaks, spots, dabs, lines

and figures.

The next day, the negroes brought in a report that, besides several

small lions, that were in the bush, there was one big fellow, the king

of them all. He was a famous man-eater, and had tasted many a black

daddy and mammy, besides not a few pickaninnies. So it is no wonder

that the African people, in telling the hunters about this beast, made

him out to be so enormous, that it was thought a whole ox could hardly

furnish him with one dinner; but this was just the sort about which

they wanted to hear, for they were not afraid. They had been practicing

camouflage, while on the ship and were now experts. The way they could

sling paint on a man’s body, and dress him up in damaged rainbows, made

them feel sure they could upset all the lion’s calculations. In fact,

they believed they could raise a brain storm, in any beast that tried

to look at them, no matter how large, or cunning he might be.

First they had the negroes dig a deep pit, and cover it over with

poles, branches, leaves and earth. They caught a fat pig, and in spite

of its squeals, they tied it to a stake, in front of the pit, out on

the flat ground.

Then, stripping off their clothes, the two men went to the paintpots.

They striped each other in wide bands, of several colors, painted round

blotches, and curves, back and front, and so daubed, and streaked, and

spotted their faces, arms, legs, back and front, that one look might

make a man or beast, first cross-eyed, and then blind, and finally

stupefied. Even the scabbards of their long knives, their only arms—for

they would take no risks—when painted in streaks, looked like a lot of

crooked rainbows.

When the signal was given to the black men, to go around and shout, and

beat the bush, Piggy began to squeal and ramp around, as if he knew he

would soon be inside the lion. At once the big brute seeing the pig,

and hoping to get a good meal, advanced toward what he supposed was to

be his dinner.

Now this king of the lions had often seen human beings, but these were

always of a dark color, with tints, ranging from chocolate brown to

ebony black. He had eaten men and children for breakfast, dinner and

supper, with an occasional extra lunch in the form of a baby. The

lion’s idea was, that all human beings were black, for he had never

traveled to Europe, with a circus company, or to Rome to fight and claw

gladiators. So, when driven out by the shouting of the bush-beaters,

the big beast plunged out into the veldt, and charged toward the pork.

He was the father of lions, in size, with a face as big as a wash tub,

and on which there was enough long hair to stuff a mattress with.

Yet in the way things turned out, there was no need, either of pig, or

pit; for the paintpots did the business. The two brave hunters were not

afraid of the monstrous beast. They rushed out of their hide-up, and

stood in his path, moving about zig-zag and crosswise, from right to

left. This bothered the lion most awfully. He could not tell who was

who, or which was which, or what was what. Relatively speaking, he

forgot whether he was himself, or his wife, or his cubs, or something

else.

Now the lion is an intellectual beast, at least he has that reputation;

but what creature lives, that can take in, and hold, two ideas at one

time? But, to have seventeen colors, hues, tints, and shades, moving

before him, fairly scrambled the contents of the lion’s brain pan.

As the two hunters leaped, danced, capered, gyrated and turned

somersaults before him, the beast lost all power to think or move. His

brain became as an omelet. He fell down helpless, whining piteously.

The two camouflaged hunters then went up to his very nose and tweaked

it. They pulled his ears, they jerked his tail, and they dragged his

carcass around; yet he cared nothing about all this, for he was

wondering whether he was a lion; or if not, what?

Before he could unscramble his senses and recover his eyesight, the

hunters, with help of a score or more of the sturdy negroes, had boxed

him up. The cage was slung on the shoulders of a dozen bearers, and

borne in triumph to the ship.

On the voyage back to Belgium if, at any time, the king of beasts was

surly, or misbehaved himself, or wanted fresh meat in the form of a

sailor, instead of salt pork, all that was necessary to make him a good

lion again, was for one of the hunters to camouflage himself, in all

colors, and then make believe to enter his den to chastise him. But no

spear, or red hot iron, or bottle of hartshorne was necessary.

The lion, on seeing the frightful figure, stopped his roaring at once,

got down off his hind legs, ceased his rampage, and settled down as

quiet as a guinea pig. Sometimes he would even lie down and roll over

on his back and flop his paws up and down, as if to say, “Please don’t!

I’ll be a good lion, if you won’t tire my poor brain, and give me a

headache, with your old camouflage.” But occasionally, he gave a low

growl as if swearing at such an impish invention; for, the story-teller

is grieved to say that the lion learned some bad language while aboard

the ship.

Nevertheless, it was not the beast but the men, that broke the peace;

for one was a Fleming and the other a Walloon, and they quarrelled as

to which part of Belgium was the oldest and most honorable from the

time of Cæsar. Each stood up stoutly for his language, and his

district, claiming that it was his ancestors that had made Belgium

great.

For this time of their quarrel was long before the Belgian people were

a true nation, with one flag, one king and a glorious national unity.

One day, the two men got into a dispute as to which of the two, the

Walloon, or the Fleming, deserved the greater credit, for confusing and

capturing the lion. The contention waxed so hot, that they almost came

to blows. Then each one camouflaged himself and tried to get possession

of the lion, both entering the cage, but from opposite sides.

But at such a sight, the king of beasts again lost his wits, and had

two brain storms at one time, from opposite lobes of the brain. He

retreated into a corner, stuck his nose through the bars, and curled up

his legs and toes, so that neither of the hunters could get hold of

anything but his tail, and hardly more than the tuft of that. Each man

grabbed hold of his caudal hair and pulled so hard, that, in spite of

the roars of pain, from the poor beast, they split the creature’s tail,

half way up, and it never healed, or came together again.

So with a split tail, double for half its length, but, fortunately with

a bit of tuft on each tip, the Belgian lion flourishes today. One half

of its divided tail is Walloon and the other half Flemish; yet now,

with pure patriotism, and loyal to a hero king and a noble queen, and

with all the people united in devotion to their homeland, only the

Belgian lion’s tail recalls the history of the past; while its body and

limbs represent the majesty, the courage, and the devotion of the brave

Belgian people.